The Woes of Gift Giving
I have had the worst luck buying gifts for Rachel. She has never seemed to like anything I have given her. Sure, there was the time I took her to the jewelry store and let her pick out two items. She liked that. But, none of the other jewelry I gave her over the years was well received.
There are some unwritten gift rules in our house. For example, I should never try to buy Rachel clothing. She wants to pick her own. But, gift certificates and cash are unwelcomed. Flowers are okay for a spontaneous occasion, a birthday, or an anniversary, but something else is expected to go with them. Flowers are a definite no-no for Valentines. I am also forbidden to give a gift that is really for the household, although she did like the very expensive vacuum I bought one time.
For years, Rachel liked candles. She got a lot of candles. After a while, I knew I couldn’t get away with that anymore. It was the same with purses. First I bought Liz Claiborne purses. Then I bought those cloth ones everyone liked. That was a good option since they wore out so fast. Still, after a while, purses were a bit overdone.
Rachel has no problem buying gifts for me. She has a really creepy knack for knowing exactly what people want. She files little comments away that fuel her ideas. Or, she just plain remembers something I may have expressed interest in. That just doesn’t seem fair to me, and just raises my level of gift giving anxiety. I am a failure.
One time about two years ago, Rachel suddenly mentioned out of the blue that she did not like leaving the bedroom light on for me when she went to sleep. That came after more than 25 years of that being our routine. Turning the light on when I come to bed and waking her up was not an option. I thought and thought about a way to solve the problem. Our lamp is on my side of the bed. We only had one bedside table. I have always been in charge of the clock. Also, I need a surface for my ice water, dental guard, and a few other things.
Having the lamp on the other side of our bed meant that Rachel would have to get up and walk around to turn it off just as she was ready to drift off to sleep. I suddenly remembered those old devices for lamps that let you clap on and off. I thought that would be the perfect solution. Crossing my fingers, I went to Amazon and found out they were still available. I ordered one, thinking I had finally found something great for Rachel.
When it arrived, I quickly set it up. It worked great. Two quick claps turned it on. Two more quick claps turned it off. Rachel would not have to get out of bed to do it. Perfect, right? Absolutely not.
For almost two weeks, I listened from down stairs as Rachel clapped over and over again trying to find the rhythm that would turn the lamp off. I even tried to teach her the two-clap rhythm, which was really easy for me, and, according to everything I read on Amazon, every other human on the planet! Nonetheless, I walked into a brightly lit room every night. Rachel simply couldn’t do it. The fact that she couldn’t, made her pretty cranky with the whole concept.
Fortunately, I found a small remote control that does work for Rachel. When she goes into the bedroom, she gets the remote off of the bedside table on my side, uses it to turn the lamp on, and carries it with her to her side of the bed. When she is ready for sleep, she uses it to turn the light off and drops it near my pillow. I use my iPhone flashlight to see as I get ready for bed. Now, everyone is happy, but I still haven’t found a good gift for Rachel.